Prayer Room #4 - Faith

    So God placed on my heart another area to wrestle with.  He is so faithful to give a desiring heart things to ponder and meditate upon.  Let me give you a little background information.  Yesterday, all the Track 1 interns got prophesied over.  It was a new experience for me because I have never been prophesied over before.  There was one prophecy that stuck out to me and is still hard for me to swallow.  My core leader Cameron came and sat by me and told me that he prayed and asked God about me, and what God gave him floored me (with doubt and questions haha).  He proceeded to tell me that God showed him an image of me as Elijah, calling down fire from Heaven. That God would be forming me into a great man of faith. (which is funny because right now I am filled with so much doubt).  That God would use me to turn the hearts of the sons to the father, and the hearts of the fathers to their sons.  I want to confess that many emotions are flooding through my mind about this.  First, how entirely unworthy I am that God has this plan for me.  Right now I admit that I am a man full of doubt and scared to give control of everything to a God so wild.  Oh how His goodness overrides those feelings, but I am still scared.  Holy Spirit I barely know Your voice, how shall I call down fire and be led by You.  How does one communicate with the Holy Spirit?  Is it the right words?  The right gestures?  No, I believe methods have no place with God.  Just because God moves at a certain place and time doesnt' mean He only works through that place and at that time.  God and Jesus have proven that there is no method to His power being displayed.  To one deaf man He spoke healing, to another He placed His fingers in His ears and healed him.  To one blind man He touched his eyes, to another He spit and made mud.  For Moses to part the Red Sea he raised His staff, for Elijah and Elisha they threw down there cloak.  God is not about method, He is about the heart. (At this point I put down my journal and did some meditating and thinking.  God pretty much rocked my paradigm of faith before I started writing this next part that night).

     Faith is so GOOD! "...Have faith in God. Truly, I say to you whoever says to this mountain, 'Be taken up and thrown into the sea', and does not doubt in his heart, but believes that what he says will come to pass, It will be done for him.  Therefore I tell you, whatever you ask in prayer, believe that you have received it, and it will be yours" Mark 11:22-24  Can I just say that it is so much better to believe than doubt?!  I read that verse and took it to heart when praying for healing over two people.  I believe that they got healed!  i don't know if I can go back.   How my spirit jumped with Joy when I placed my faith and believed that they were healed.  It puts into sharp focus everything else I can't see.  God's plan for my life, healing, prophecy, the Holy Spirit moving and working, God's leadership.  O How I am moved with such Joy!  Such freedom!  I believe that You are a POWERFUL God!  Full of mercy and steadfast love and faithfulness.  Because of these promises I can step out in faith and believe!  I believe without seeing, without knowing, by disregarding logic.  Increase this fervency!  Place the very things You desire on my heart!  So that I would ask and You would grant Your servant approval in these matters! Amen